06 Thursday Nov 2014
Posted in Articles
Reflecting on the recent events in our social world, i became more aware of the importance of Trust and its impact on our relationships with one another.
This video explained beautifully why Trust is worth it. Enjoy!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cWypWe9UAhQ
Happy Possibilities,
Tahereh Barati
01 Monday Sep 2014
Posted in Articles
Tags
Aggerssion, Class, Class division, Class Wars, Destruction, Fighting, Future possibilities, Human Conflicts, human relationships, Humanity, Labour Day, Labour Movement, Movie reviews, movies, Racial identity, social change, Social Hierarchy, Social Justice, Social Location, Train of Life, War Crimes, Wars
SnowPiercer is a move with a great production reflecting on our current social dilemmas. It is a movie about social location, social inequality and social justice.
Today is Labour day that we recognize the importance of the labour movement in promoting social justice and equality. I think this movie offers us alternative possibilities to end the current social injustice and inequality.
We are all born into per-existing places in society based on our race, age, intellect, culture and ethnicity, class, sexuality and (dis) ability. The social locations of each individual are not decided by individuals but by structural systems established for centuries. The notion of social location is like the ‘cast system’. It is the subtle disguised version of the cast system. Remember! the cast system used to be an acceptable system in old empires such as Rome, Persia, and also it is currently, somewhat, practiced in India.
The movie, Snowpiercer, illustrates the destructive impact of social locations on people’s life very vividly. It also reveals the invisible long- lasting collaboration between the leaders of oppositions (shoes and heads). It shows how the leaders of oppositions plan and decide for citizens; when and how citizens should be treated, when and how the population needs to be reduced or increased and so forth. The sad part is that the both leaders (shoes and heads) create and plan wars among citizens. The leaders of shoes and heads work for the maintenance of the social/ power structure and inequality. Their mission is to maintain the power!
Interestingly enough, as the leaders of shoes and heads are aged, they realize that to maintain the social (dis) order and inequality, they need to find a replacement who is committed to the money- making machine, who has greed for power and who maintains the statues quo. Who would they pass the torch onto? Of course, a person from the middle class is chosen; a person who has seen and experienced poverty and who has shown enough intellects to climb up the ladder of power.
The dialogue between the leader of heads and the new leader is the best part of the movie. In that dialogue, the new leader discovers deceits, lies, and games of killing that lead to people’s suffering.
The new realizations give him courage and new set of responsibilities. He becomes the leader of a new movement. A movement to end the normalized social locations/social inequality/social injustice. He has a dream! a vision and hope for people. His new movement aims to flatten social hierarchies and all its associated practices. His actions and intentions are to bring back freedom, liberty and justice to people. How? There is no more choices left but to stop the train, the machine, and the social power structure. And that is how the new life is promised; a life in harmony with nature and other species…
I enjoyed the movie very much. Like many, I yearn for the return of equality and social justice to people’s life. Who knows maybe by 2031, we will have ended all man-made wars. Who knows maybe by 2031, we will have become more conscious of the impact of what we do to one another. Who knows maybe by 2031, we will have put a stop into any forms of social inequality, social hierarchy and social injustice!
Happy Labour Day!
Happy Possibilities!
Tahereh Barati
30 Saturday Aug 2014
Posted in Articles
Tags
Conflict dissolution, Conflict resolution, Dissolving conflicts, Education, empathy, Expert Knowledge, human relationships, knowledge, Knowledge as Power, Respect, Soical responsibility, Understanding, Understanding as Power, Understanding with empathy
Have you ever thought of the differences between ‘Knowing and Understanding’? How do you differentiate these two?
I, lately, found myself thinking more and more about ‘knowing and understanding’ and their differences. Listening to National and International News or reading articles on human dilemmas brought their differences more into my attention.
Knowing is a privilege of comprehension, when one learns something and accumulates knowledge related to what was learned. To be a know-er, one goes to school, college or university, learns a subject matter and becomes an expert or specialized in a particular area of expertise. We have become good at collecting information and knowing. Our social cultural and educational systems are focused on teaching people to view ‘Knowledge as Power’.
However, Understanding is a privilege of critical thinking, empathy and social responsibility. Understanding is formed when what is learned are responsibly and critically re-viewed . Understanding is when we pause our thinking process and pay attention to impacts of our actions on others; when we put ourselves on someone else’s shoe and experience their affection and pain; when we become aware of the influence of our actions on our communities and society.
Knowing is usually achieved by attending schools and getting certificate or license; however, Understanding is generated by life experience, by giving attention to the layers of our social fabrics, by thinking critically about our contribution to problems in the world.
We all are taught to become a know-er, an expert. ‘Knowledge is Power’ was the slogan of the 20th century. We were taught to use any opportunities to climb up the ladder of ‘success’. We have learned that Understanding is an obstacle to one’s success.
On the other hand, we haven’t learned to explore ways of generating Understanding in human relationships. We haven’t learned to view Understanding as Power. We have to begin to undo what we have learned as those are obstacles to Understanding.
I don’t think we can go on this way for another century. Understanding has to be developed in our interpersonal relationships. Understanding has to be a critical part of human relationships. Understanding our differences, respecting various ideas and beliefs, and consequently, developing social responsibility are seemed to be the only avenues to preserving humanity.
Where do you place yourself in the spectrum of ‘knowing /understanding’? What actions are you taking to become an understanding person? How would you like to contribute in generating Understanding on matters that affect us all?
Happy Possibilities,
Tahereh Barati
08 Friday Aug 2014
Posted in Articles, Reflection
Tags
Balance, connection, culture, Disconnection, Equilibrium, Future, Future of man kind, Generational Knowledge, Greed, Human Brain, Human capacity, human relationships, imagination, Logical thinking, LUCY, Modernism, Modernsim, Movie Review, Nietzsche, Past, Post Modernism, Power and Control, power imbalance, Rational thinking, relational beings, society
The movie, LUCY, is a masterpiece; it portrays human as the powerful species. LUCY is an embodiment of a modernism; a dream/ idea about an intelligent victorious man conquering others, time and space. It is about what Nietzsche said ‘God is Dead’. LUCY is about knowledge as a source of power and control.
The age of modernism is over and LUCY gets to its 100% presence and disappears. The age of modernism gets to its full potential and eventually destroys itself; it leaves us its achievements and disappears. The time for a rigid, logical/ rational insensible thinking is coming to an end.
LUCY is about the rise and fall of logical/ rational/ intellectual mind that controls others, information, time and space. It is true that human without brain are not human but the exhaustion of human intelligence and exaggerated use of power and control will have led us to destruction of human species, environment and morality.
In the movie, the main two engines/ motives for human species to survive are: a) immortality b) reproduction. In the history of mankind, human have swung between these two. In modern era, the force to increase immortality was intensified/heightened and consequently, the reproduction rate became decreased. We are at the end of this era.
We are going to swing back and forth to find equilibrium. This will not be achieved when power and control run the mind of human beings. Equilibrium is achieved when power and knowledge are shared and interpreted relationally.
Yes, LUCY is a great example of what Michelle Foucault predicted. Yes, we have become LUCY. Yes, it is in all of us who were born into the rigid, logical, and rational world of modernism; it is in all of us who perpetuated modern thinking and implemented it in others’ lives and ours. Yes, LUCY is everywhere; LUCY is in all of us!
When I was leaving the theater, there were a young couple sat in their chairs looking puzzled. They said that they didn’t understand LUCY and they weren’t sure what LUCY was all about. Now, reflecting back on the young couple’s words, I have more appreciation for them.
It seems our new generations ask questions and scrutinize the presence of power and control in human interactions. The answer is new generations that question the achievements of technology, that look with suspicious upon greed, knowledge, and power. Their questions will bring the lost equilibrium back to life.
Yes, equilibrium will make us human, again, connected and engaged with each other relationally and ethically. Equilibrium will allow all paradoxical pieces of understanding to co-exist; it will put an end to use of personal/social/technical/intellectual power over/against each other. Equilibrium will connect us not rationally but relationally.
Yes, the new era has begun!
Happy Possibilities,
Tahereh Barati
14 Monday Jul 2014
Posted in Articles
Tags
Communication, culture of patriarchy, Gender Issues, human relationships, Mother-daughter, relationship, Self Image, Soical Discourses
This article shares my view on the importance of mother- daughter relationship in all aspects; particularly, when it comes to self-image. The relationships between mother and daughter have been affected by patriarchy. This article suggests and encourages us to change it. Enjoy!
12 Saturday Jul 2014
Posted in Articles
Tags
competition, Dignity, Discourse of Failour, Final Match, Football Matches, human relationships, Humiliation, Humility, National Shame, Priciples, Quarter Finals, Respect, Round of 16, Semi-Final Match, Shame, Soccer Matches, Sportmanship, Success, The World Cup, Winning, World Cup 2014
The FiFA World Cup is a great opportunity to watch how life of each team unfolds and folds. As you may know, 200 countries participate in qualifying matches and only 32 team enters into the FIFA World Cup. During the matches, each team has to show its skills, clinical abilities, and physical endurance to be qualified to advance to the next level.
The World Cup has inter-national and multi- generational audience/fans. The rules and principles of football are practiced during a match. Football/soccer is a communal sport; it is based on teamwork, collaboration, and healthy competition; it promotes respect and good manners during the match. Sportsmanship is the key to passing on this particular way of playing to the next generation and youngsters.
What is expected to happen in the World Cup is the embodiment of these principles and spirit. The disappointing part of the World Cup 2014 was not seeing this happening and not seeing many great teams with highest qualification to fulfill this expectation.
During the semi- finals matches, as we clearly remember, the host was badly defeated. The path of glory for the winning team was paved at the expense of the gross humiliation and failure of the host team. As I continue reflecting on the semi-final match, I found myself asking the following questions:
Nations/countries like people have dignity. We need to be mindful of and guard the dignity. We don’t need to drag each other to the lowest level of negativity when we are winning. The scare left on a nation or a person from the experience of failure is heavily connected to how we treated them when falling. One’s dignity is defined by our dignified actions towards others. When our actions are not guarding the dignity of others, our winning place will not be heartfelt.
Happy Possibilities,
Tahereh Barati
11 Tuesday Feb 2014
Posted in Articles, Reflection
Tags
Check ins, collaboration, connection, conversation, cooperation, emotional connection, Emotional Intersection, equality, Human connection, Human relations, human relationships, Practice of bridging, social constructionist ideas, Transparency
Lately I have been thinking of what makes a conversation easier between two people. I came to realize that if people don’t meet each other in a shared emotional intersection, they might not be able to be present to one another. What makes two people present to each other is crucial in conversation. People need to be in a same/similar/familiar emotional space to be able to talk to one another in a more effective and understanding way.
Practice of ‘Check- In’ would bring people together to experience emotional connection. It would invite people to join in a shared emotional space. Practice of ‘Check- In’ is a practice of self-disclosure; it is a practice that allows the other person to get to know one’s emotional space; it is an invitation to inform others about one’s state of mind and emotions. People become more in tune with each other’s particular emotional mental and relational states. People experience connecting with one another in a more leveled equal and transparent way.
Practice of ‘Check- In’ also provides an opportunity to join in having dialogues to address much broader issues such as organizational social and political matters. This practice would allow people to defuse visible and invisible conflicts and become more aware of each other’s vulnerabilities.
Happy Conversations!
Tahereh Barati, M.A, RMFT
08 Wednesday May 2013
Posted in Articles, Reflection
Tags
abuse, Aggression, Amour, Conflicts, cultural values, democracy, domination, empowerment, human relationships, Land, love, patriarchy, power balance, refusal acts, Social discources, tradition, violence, War, War Machine
Violence has many forms, levels and degrees; for instance, violence between men and women, violence between generations, violence between races, cultures and religions in a society and international violence between countries.
Most violence are ironically related to love; love for a person, love for God, love for democracy, love for land, love for …..
Do you think it is possible to love without any desire to possession, domination and control? Is it possible to love without being intrusive, without eliminating and limiting others’ freedom and wishes in life?
As we know, traditional patriarchal relationships have changed in western countries and women have fought for their advancements in the past few decades. This social cultural shift has not happened in eastern countries. It seems that eastern countries are experiencing what western countries went through in 1950s. This transition, as hard as it may be, is necessary.
Women in eastern countries are in transition; they are in the process of change; they began to question patriarchal traditions as well as their own roles in family and society. They take initiatives to invite new ideas to their lives but social cultural and legal support are not there yet.
Why do you think love and violence got linked together? Who gets benefits from this marriage? Why do we attach positive meanings to acts of violence at times? What is the role of social discourses in this? Why have not we learned to love without exercising possession domination and violence? What are the barriers to experiencing love without violence? Any ideas?
We intuitively know that love and violence don’t mix. We know that love is not genuinely experienced/ felt at presence of violence. We know that any signs of violence- possession, domination, aggression- is destructive to love. Why is it that this knowing is not included when interacting with one another?
To reduce violence in our interactions, we need to review our cultural values and beliefs; we need to separate destructive behaviours from acts that signify love. We can not practice violence, domination and possession and name them as acts of love. Love is damaged when violence, domination and possession are practiced in relationship.
Let’s resist accepting traditions that maintain the presence of violence in our life. Let’s open our eyes, see things differently and do things differently!
Happy Possibilities!
Tahereh Barati, M.A, RMFT
27 Sunday Jan 2013
Posted in Articles
Tags
100% for or aganist, awareness, collaboration, conflict, conflict prevention, cooperation, devotion, extremism, gridlocks, human knoweldge, human relationships, multiplicity, political gridlocks, reflection, relational gridlocks, religion, stepping back, truth
Why do you think people get into a heated talk? Why and how is Conflict formed in relationship? Is it possible people talk about serious issues without experiencing Conflict?
I think there is only one condition that forms, fuels and escalates Conflict in human relationships; and that is Zone of Extremism.
I believe conflict is a byproduct of our extreme positions on issues that matter to us. We may have lots of reasons to become for or against an idea but when we enter into a debate or conversation, it is important to be open to others’ points of views. The belief that the position we take is the only way, the only truth, and the best, leads us to experience conflict. This is what i call the zone of extremism. The zone that brings more harm to relationships than good; the zone that locks us into polarized positions and the zone that make us stuck in a gridlock for a long period of time. So
We are entering into a zone that supports formation, maintenance and escalation of conflicts between two parties in personal, social and political relationships.
The solution may seem to be apparent, however it is not easily doable. What makes avoiding conflict difficult is the influence of the zone of extremism on both parties involved in conversations. When two persons enter into this zone, they become locked into a position- 100% for /against- which doesn’t allow them to be open and see things from different perspectives.
Awareness is required prior to entering into conversation, when two parties begin to share their points of views on serious matters. To develop awareness and consciousness, we need to consider paying attention to the following to prevent a formation of conflict:
Hope we experience fewer conflicts in our daily conversations with one another. Remember, there is some truth in every idea; everything that we know about ourselves and our conditions is part of our collective human knowledge; and human knowledge is not complete.
Happy Possibilities,
Tahereh Barati, M.A, RMFT
